Wednesday, October 26, 2011

UNIVERSITY JOKES

UNIVERSITY JOKES!!!!


Deodorant:

Ateneo - Secret
La Salle - Sure
UST - Rexona
UP - Babes
NU - Splash Deowhitener
PUP - Tawas
AMA- dinidikdik na stork, sing lamig pero di sing mahal

++++++++++++++

Multivitamins:

UA&P - Pharmaton
Ateneo - Rogin-E
La Salle - Centrum
UST - Clusivol
AMA - Star Rice

++++++++++++++

Reaction of students to BMW

Ateneo - my dad has one like that
DLSU - dad, buy me naman that
UP - dad, that is not worth buying
UST - wow, dad, cool car
AMA - itay, pakodak tayo sa tabi!!!

++++++++++++++

Expressions of Schools

Ateneo - whatever!
DLSU - duh!?
Assumption - oh my god!
UST - gosh!
UP - ganon?
AMA - chuvachuchu

++++++++++++++

Tawag sa mga estudyante

Ateneo - Atenista
DLSU - Lasalista or La Sallite
UP - taga-UP
Assumption - Assumptionista
UST - Thomasian
San Beda - Bedan
AMA - Jolinians

++++++++++++++

If the national flower of the philippines is sampaguita, what is the
offical
flower of AMA?

A: Paper Roses

++++++++++++++

Parlor:

ADMU - frank provost
La Salle - roger craig
CSB - paradigm
CRC - bcbg
UST - davis deowhitener
FEU - ricky reyes
AMA - rejoice portable sink with paolo bediones

++++++++++++++

Bags:

ADMU - nine west
La salle - esprit
CRC - polo
Assumption - prada
UP - ucb
UST - native bags
AMA - guess.. ...what? plastic bag

++++++++++++++

Month:

DLSU - february(hearts day)
CRC - december(holidays)
Ateneo - march(graduation)
AMA - april(boys) IDOL!!!

++++++++++++++

Gimik:

DLSU- abgs
ADMU- fatwillys
Beda- mars
CEU - padis
UST - chatterbox
AMA - di nyo kami maaapi ngayon sa hardrock kami! may concert si jolina!
beeh!

++++++++++++++

Reaction pagnawalan ng wallet

ADMU - fuck! my credit cards are there
DLSU - shit! i have 5,000 bucks
UST - pare yung driver's license ko
AMA - punyemas, yung picture ni jolina!

++++++++++++++

Reaction after looking at a Sauna Showroom:

La salle - ganda ng #69
UP - ok si 74
UST - yun magaling sa kama
ADMU - #8 nagbi-BJ
AMA - shit! alis na tayo si #1 ate ko

++++++++++++++

pag may kaaway

CRC - aikido
ADMU - judo
DLSU - taekwondo
UST - boxing
AMA - sayunachi...sayonachi...sayona chinelas ko...TAKBO!

++++++++++++++

Cellphone orders in Greenhills

La Salle - 6680 please
ADMU - five housing for my 6681
UP - car charger nga
UST - extra battery
UE - two pieces of P1,000 GLOBE cards
AMA - (pabulong) may brochure kayo?

++++++++++++++

Expressions pag nakakuha ng funny ***

ADMU - hahaha, funny
DLSU - yeah, right
UP - t***** OK to ah
AMA- t***** tayo na naman ang pinag-uusapan ah!

++++++++++++++

Reaction ng marinig ang new *** scheme

La Salle - bad trip
ADMU - s***
UST - bwisit
CKSC - piaw si eh
FEU - diyahe naman
AMA - yes, wala ng mang-aasar sa atin

++++++++++++++

DLSU - kala mo archer, pana lang pala
FEU - tamaraw nabiyaheng lawton
Ateneo - gold eagle, paborito ng lasenggo
UST- tiger daw, katol lang pala
from: AMA

++++++++++++++

NEWS ADVISORY: There was an investigation done to Globe because of
their new
text scheme. It was found out that the president of Globe is an Alumni
of
AMA. Kayo kasi eh...

++++++++++++++

Situation: nabangga ang car.

UP: Pare anuba, papasada pa ko mamaya e!
ADMU: ****! My dad's gonna kill me for this!
DLSU: Ah, shit! My car's not yet insured!
AMA: Tang ina di na nga umaandar babanggain mo pa!

Source: USTexchange.com

++++++++++++++

Iniinom ng mga students sa bar:

LaSalle - mule
AdMU - subzero
CRC - heineken
UP - super dry
UST - pale pilsen
FEU - blue ice
MAPUA - miller
CEU - tanduay
AMA - zesto

++++++++++++++

DLSU/CSB - tambay, punta sa kotse
UST - punta mall, coffee break
ATENEO - tambay, review notes
ASSUMPTION - punta quad, pa cute cute
AMA - uwi agad, abang Esperanza

++++++++++++++

AdMU - Nangunguna na sa Law
UP - sa Law din
DLSU - sa Business and Accounting
UST - sa Medicine
AMA - sa pila ng Hey Babe

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